You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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