i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
