as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
My dad is sitting where you rode me
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize