We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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