I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize