It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
