Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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