Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
