Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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