i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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