he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
