fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize