I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
