we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
