he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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