I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
