..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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