Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
