That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
