They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
