pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
