look no pants
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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