Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize
