Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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