everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
