Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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