handjob tips. give me some.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
