And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
