wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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