He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
