well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize