am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Randomize
