Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
