She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
