You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize