the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
