so that wasnt chicken after all
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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