Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
