There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
