so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
