How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
As shirtless as possible
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
