what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
