I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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