I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
You smell like stripper and shame
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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