Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize