just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
