She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
