im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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