so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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