Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I didn't shave. On purpose
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize