Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
This is my gift to your gina
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
