you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
