no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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